The right place, The right time, The right words

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.I was hyperventilating.

I tried to calm myself down. Closed my eyes. Inhaled a long whiff of air. Exhaled.

I hate when this happened. When I start breathing excessively hard. Which is usually a result of some haunting dream. I tried recollecting the dream and as usual, my efforts were in vain.

I sat up and searched the table for my glasses. After fumbling around a bit, I found them. I put them on. I looked at my watch for the time. It was 3:27 am.

My sleep was very much disturbed. I opened the door and made my way to a favorite retreat, my balcony wall. Sitting on the parapet, I stared at the waning moon.

I was in two minds. Should I call her now? Something told me not to, not to wake her up as such an inhuman hour. But then I had to.

I dialed her number and watched the flashing fluorescent screen as it tried to connect. Shortly afterwards, I placed the phone to my ear and heard the melodious song she had replaced the ubiquitous quotidian ringing tone with. This is taking too long, maybe I should disconnect.

“Hello?” a drowsy effeminate voice answered. I was thrilled. “Hi, it’s me. Sorry for waking you up”, I said, sotto voce. I was half afraid she was going to be mad. “It is alright. Tell me, what’s up?” Did she sound indifferent? Or was it just Hypnos being caustic on losing someone? I was not feeling too confident of continuing the conversation but as the same time did not want to end the call.

“Well, I had a dream,” I continued and not knowing what else to say, adlibbed, “about you.” I don’t know why I did what I did. She had already told me enough times about how she felt about me. She had made it clear, no, abundantly clear that our relationship was one shared by two intimate friends. Bordering on a sisterly relationship. I had tried to convince her too many times already. Now grave, she replied, “You know how I feel about this. About you. I …” I interrupted, “ No, it’s not like that. I did have a dream about you. But in the dream you die” Where did that come from?

An eerie silence pervaded the conversation. Uncomfortable. “Hello?” I inquired. She sounded positively sweet though still retaining a serious tone as she replied “Yes, I’m here.” Well well well. Something was different. Almost as if some invisible barrier had been pulled down. I couldn’t understand this completely but played along. “Yeah, as I was saying, I had this horrible dream in which you die. I woke up all startled and shaken up. I had to call you and hear your voice. Your mellisonant voice. How I love it. How I love your playful dimpled smile. And your sinuous black flowing tresses. And your perfect brown eyes, those two expressive windows where I get lost for days on end. And you.”

“I love you” I stated, hoping for some response. “I love you and will love you forever. Please tell me you love me too.” She was quiet. Too quiet.

“So, tell me, please…” Suddenly I was interrupted by a phone ringing. Absolutely confused, I realized it was the phone I was speaking into. It was her calling.

I answered the call, “Hey.” “Hey, the phone got cut and I thought you would call back. So I waited for a while and then called. So you were saying something about a dream?” She sounded inquisitive and waiting for something. Waiting to hear what I had already just told. To my cellphone.

“Well, nothing much. Just wanted to call you and make sure you are alright.” And on a delayed afterthought and much heartache, added, “Sis”.